Why Our Spouses Get Our Leftover Prayers (And How to Change It)

　　By: Jennifer Waddle

　　“Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; forthis is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

　　On a recent kayak trip with my husband, I paddled slowly across the lake, praying for my kids and grandkids. Naming them one by one, I asked for God’s covering and blessing. That’s when I saw my husband coming towardme with a small wave and a smile.The check-in reminded me that I’d forgotten to cover him in prayer—something thathappens more often than I’d like to admit.

　　Why do our spouses get our leftover prayers? It’s not because they aren’t importantto us, but perhaps we’ve grown so comfortable with them that we forget they need our intercessions.

　　As we enjoyed our time on the lake, I made it a point to thank God for my spouse, listing the things I loved most about him and determining to make him more of a priority in my daily prayer life.

　　If, like me,your spouse tends to get your leftover prayers, here are a few ways to change it.

　　Pray in Order

　　Including my husband in my daily prayers becomes easy when I remember the order of things. After my relationship with God, my husband is my next priority. However, I find it easy to put my children and grandchildren first, thinking of their needs above my spouse. Can you relate?

　　For women, especially, it’s easy to get things out of order—to focus more on ourselves or our kids instead of our husbands. To change this, keeping a prayer journal with a list of requests is helpful, intentionallyputting our spouses at the top. Even if there aren’t specific things to pray for, thanking God for them and asking for His divine covering is just as powerful.

　　Here’s a simple prayer to add to your daily routine: Lord, please bless my spouse today - heart, mind, soul, and strength. Put your hedge of protection around them, blessing them with love and favor. In Jesus’ name, amen.

　　Once this practice becomes routine, your spouse will no longer get your leftover prayers; instead, they willbe prioritizedin the beautiful way God intended.

　　Pray with Gratitude

　　When I do remember to mention my husband in prayer, the first thing I do is thank God for him. He is gentle, kind, considerate, and trustworthy. Listing these attributes grows my gratitude for him, reminding me to pray even more for the amazingguy he is.

　　If you’re struggling to list positive characteristics about your spouse, start with just one. Even the smallestthing can spark prayers of gratitude and open up more avenues of thanksgiving and praise.

　　Perhaps your spouse works hard to provide for your family. Maybe he’s a good dad to your kids. Or it could be he gives great shoulder rubs! Whatever comes to mind, thank God for big things and small. Ask the Lord to open your eyes to even more praise-worthy attributes and purposely pray with a heart of gratitude.

　　Proverbs 18:22 says, “He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from theLord.” With this verse in mind, thank God daily for providing you with a spouse to love, cherish, and cover in prayer.

　　Pray in Obedience

　　AsPaul said to the church in Thessalonica, “Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” Imagine what could happen if we applied this same practice in praying for our spouses!

　　We might not always feel like praying, but when we commit to it in obedience to God, our feelings often follow. Praying continually for our spouses becomes an easy habit when we approach it with purpose and devotion. In this, God sees our faithfulness and blesses our efforts.

　　From a heart of obedience, prayers for our spouses can make all the difference. Mountains can be movedwhen wecommit to prayingfor them regularly, making them a priorityandthanking God for them. Imagine the marital blessings yet to come as you pray for your spouse first and foremost.

　　Heavenly Father, thank You for my spouse, who has many amazingqualities and characteristics. Forgive me for overlooking them in my prayers, consistently giving them my leftovers. Please help me prioritize my spouse and consider their needs above my own. Help me be diligent in prayer, purposeful in gratitude, and faithful in obedience. Remind me, daily, to think of them as the first person on my prayer list, covering them with intercession and praise. I am grateful for thespouseYou’ve given me, and I’m ready to prioritize them in new ways. I trust You to lead and guide me as I renew my commitment to pray for them. In Jesus’ holy name, amen.

　　Photo credit: ©GettyImages/bernardbodo

　　Jennifer Waddle is the author of several books, including Prayer WORRIER: Turning Every Worry into Powerful Prayer,and is a regular contributor for LifeWay, Crosswalk, Abide, and Christians Care International. Jennifer’s online ministry is EncouragementMama.com where you can find her books and sign up for her weekly post, Discouragement Doesn’t Win. She resides with her family near the foothills of the Rocky Mountains—her favorite place on earth.

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