In this age, women shoulder many responsibilities and burdens which form mental and physical pressures. A woman goes to work and suffers due to the means of transportation, domineering bosses and the required mental and physical effort. Then comes her main job that she was created to do and from which she can never escape or violate: her responsibility to take care of her husband, home and children. This includes the required effort, patience and energy to look after her children physically and emotionally, and to follow up on their educational process. She also has to look after her husband emotionally and physically. Being under all these pressures, a woman looks at her husband and hopes that he will feel her pain, help her with some of her responsibilities and alleviate some of her burdens.
Many men refuse to help their wives with the housework. Could the poor hard-pressed woman demand assistance as one of her rights? Is it obligatory upon her husband to help her?
Some women may go astray thinking that the West gives such rights to the woman while Islam deprives her of them. She may regard the western man, who helps his wife with all the housework, as a symbol of civilization. At the same time, she considers the Muslim husband to be a symbol of backwardness. This attitude degrades the Muslim man greatly.
If both husband and wife contemplate the lives of the Prophet, , and his Companions, they would find fine examples that a woman can ask her husband to follow. She can ask her husband to imitate what they did in their homes and with their wives. Surely, a Muslim man would rather imitate the Prophet, , and his Companions than Western men?
The Prophet, , said: “The best amongst you are those who are best towards their wives, and I am the best amongst you towards my wives.”How was the Prophet, , the best person at home and with his family? ‘Aa’ishah, may Allah be pleased with her, informed us that he would be at the service of his family, and when he would hear the Athaan (call to prayer), he would go out for Salah (prayer).
‘Aa’ishah, may Allah be pleased with her, also informed us of what types of services he would do: The Prophet, , would mend his shoes, sweep the house, sew his clothes and milk the sheep; that is to say he would help his wives with all their housework. He really was a great Prophet!
He was married to nine women and if he had ordered any of them with tasks, he would have been obeyed and would not be burdening her, as each of the wives would have only done the tasks assigned to her. However, the Prophet, , freed them from these responsibilities out of mercy and love.
The Prophet, , said: “I advise you to be kind to women. They are with you and have not any power over their own affairs. You have certainly taken them by the trust of Allah and you have had them lawful [to you] by the word of Allah The Almighty.”The Prophet, , encouraged men to help women, pointing out that man will be rewarded for all that he does for his wife. The Companions, may Allah be pleased with them, applied his advice.
Does the modern Muslim man even bring his wife a glass of water like the Companions, may Allah be pleased with them, would do, following the example of the Prophet, ?.