Home
/
RELIGION & LIBERTY ONLINE
/
Advice to graduates: Reject the calls to ‘find yourself’ and ‘follow your passion’
Advice to graduates: Reject the calls to ‘find yourself’ and ‘follow your passion’
Jan 17, 2026 8:26 AM

Graduation season is upon us, and with it is sure e a flurry mencement addresses crammed with platitudes about self-actualization, self-indulgence, and self-fulfillment. Though panied by occasional urges to “change the world” and “make a difference,” all will still fit neatly within a much broader cultural aim: “finding ourselves,” “trusting ourselves,” and “being true to ourselves.”

“It’s about living the life you want,”Oprah says, aptly capturing the spirit of the age, “because a great percentage of the population is living a life that their mother wanted, that their husband wanted, that they thought or heard they wanted…Start embracing the life that is calling you and use your life to serve the world.”

Meanwhile, the real and tangible needs of our social and economic contexts swirl around us—present and future, seen and unforeseen—each of them held captive to the whims of our “passions” and “the life we want.” Overwhelmed by the distraction, we look inward, neglecting the moral foundations and social bonds that are so critical munities and institutions to flourish.

The causes and effects are diverse and widespread, but as David Brooks explains in his book, The Road to Character, much of it begins with our basic cultural views about calling, vocation, and economic value. mencement speakers tell graduates to follow their passion, to trust their feelings, to reflect and find their purpose in life.” Brooks writes. “…Commencement speeches are larded with the same clichés…Don’t accept limits. Chart your own course. You have a responsibility to do great things because you are so great. This is the gospel of self-trust.”

Being a healthy and ethical person is important, to be sure, but our focus has instead turned to the indulgence of personal dreams and desires, regardless of moral obligations or situational context. “Giving back” and “doing good” are celebrated at the surface, but each is filtered backwards through the narrow lens of “self-discovery.” As a result, other people and social/economic institutions are viewed and treated as a mere means for our “meaning making”—a functional role in our business plan for personal happiness and prosperity.

Brooks summarizes this approach as follows:

When you are young and just setting out into adulthood, you should, by this way of thinking, sit down and take some time to discover yourself, to define what is really important to you, what your priorities are, what arouses your deepest passions. You should ask certain questions: What is the purpose of my life? What do I want from life? What are the things that I truly value, that are not done just to please or impress the people around me?

By this way of thinking, life can be organized like a business plan. First you take an inventory of your gifts and passions. Then you set goals e up with some metrics to organize your progress toward those goals. Then you map out a strategy to achieve your purpose, which will help you distinguish those things that move you toward your goals from those things that seem urgent but are really just distractions. If you define a realistic purpose early on and execute your strategy flexibly, you will wind up leading a purposeful life. You will have achieved self-determination.

This is the way people tend to organize their lives in our age of individual autonomy. It’s a method that begins with the self and ends with the self, that begins with self-investigation and ends in self-fulfillment. This is a life determined by a series of individual choices.

Without a proper heart orientation that is at first upward and outward, such a perspective will manifest in shrugging ambivalence and social isolation, much of which we’ve already begun to see.

Yet if we reverse that order, Brooks continues, we begin to ask ourselves a different set of questions, aligning our imaginations accordingly:

In this method, you don’t ask, What do I want from life? You ask a different set of questions: What does life want from me? What are my circumstances calling me to do?

In this scheme of things we don’t create our lives; we are summoned by life. The important answers are not found inside; they are found outside. This perspective begins not within the autonomous self, but with the concrete circumstances in which you happen to be embedded. This perspective begins with an awareness that the world existed long before you and will last long after you, and that in the brief span of your life you have been thrown by fate, by history, by chance, by evolution, or by God into a specific place with specific problems and needs. Your job is to figure certain things out: What does this environment need in order to be made whole? What is it that needs repair? What tasks are lying around waiting to be performed?

Such an approach requires quite the opposite of the typical cultural requirements: self-denial, self-sacrifice, and the cultivation of an abiding, genuine love for others. Only with these will we discover true fulfillment, and yet only when these are seen as a good and moral duty in and of themselves. “A person who embraces a calling doesn’t take a direct route to self-fulfillment,” Brooks explains. “She is willing to surrender the things that are most dear, and by seeking to forget herself and submerge herself she finds a purpose that defines and fulfills herself.”

As Christians, more specifically, we are called to ground our sense of calling in obedience to God, first and foremost, from which flows the good of neighbor—and back and forth and back again. The Biblical story is filled with examples of God calling people to tasks, careers, and vocations that at first seemed largely misaligned with their gifts, talents, and “passions.” From Moses to Gideon to Jonah to Saul to Elijah to Peter, God routinely gives specific direction to specific people, and in doing so, confounds the designs of man, redirecting us instead toward new forms of service and sacrifice.

Discerning that path involves the type of “external needs assessment” that Brooks points to, but it also involves a basic acceptance of the Gospel, surrender to Jesus, whole-life transformation by the Holy munity among believers, active and attentive prayer, relationship, discipleship, and so on. It is not enough to simply “follow our passion,” but it also involves a whole lot more than selflessly assessing the job market and being sheer career chameleons.

As Benjamin Mann puts it, vocation is “a school of charity” and “a means of crucifixion.” In turn, our entrance into broader society carries with it a deeper, wider, more mysterious calculation and heart orientation. “Your ability to discern your vocation depends on the condition of your eyes and ears, whether they are sensitive enough to understand the assignment your context is giving you,” Brooks concludes.

As the latest crop of graduates enters the workforce, as well as a much wider range of family, social, and economic institutions, let us remember that it is not “passion” or “self-determination,” but a weight of moral vision mitment that we so desperately need.

Image: StockSnap, Pixabay License

Comments
Welcome to mreligion comments! Please keep conversations courteous and on-topic. To fosterproductive and respectful conversations, you may see comments from our Community Managers.
Sign up to post
Sort by
Show More Comments
RELIGION & LIBERTY ONLINE
Verse of the Day
  Commentary on Today's Verse   Commentary on Mark 13:5-13   (Read Mark 13:5-13)   Our Lord Jesus, in reply to the disciples' question, does not so much satisfy their curiosity as direct their consciences. When many are deceived, we should thereby be awakened to look to ourselves. And the disciples of Christ, if it be not their own fault, may enjoy holy security...
Verse of the Day
  Commentary on Today's Verse   Commentary on Jonah 2:1-9   (Read Jonah 2:1-9)   Observe when Jonah prayed. When he was in trouble, under the tokens of God's displeasure against him for sin: when we are in affliction we must pray. Being kept alive by miracle, he prayed. A sense of God's good-will to us, notwithstanding our offences, opens the lips in prayer,...
Verse of the Day
  Commentary on Today's Verse   Commentary on Daniel 6:1-5   (Read Daniel 6:1-5)   We notice to the glory of God, that though Daniel was now very old, yet he was able for business, and had continued faithful to his religion. It is for the glory of God, when those who profess religion, conduct themselves so that their most watchful enemies may find...
Verse of the Day
  Commentary on Today's Verse   Commentary on James 3:13-18   (Read James 3:13-18)   These verses show the difference between men's pretending to be wise, and their being really so. He who thinks well, or he who talks well, is not wise in the sense of the Scripture, if he does not live and act well. True wisdom may be know by the...
Verse of the Day
  Commentary on Today's Verse   Commentary on Matthew 5:3-12   (Read Matthew 5:3-12)   Our Saviour here gives eight characters of blessed people, which represent to us the principal graces of a Christian. 1. The poor in spirit are happy. These bring their minds to their condition, when it is a low condition. They are humble and lowly in their own eyes. They...
Verse of the Day
  Commentary on Today's Verse   Commentary on Luke 6:1-5   (Read Luke 6:1-5)   Christ justifies his disciples in a work of necessity for themselves on the sabbath day, and that was plucking the ears of corn when they were hungry. But we must take heed that we mistake not this liberty for leave to commit sin. Christ will have us to know...
Verse of the Day
  1 Corinthians 15:57 In-Context   55 Where, O death, is your victory? Where, O death, is your sting?Hosea 13:14   56 The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law.   57 But thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.   58 Therefore, my dear brothers and sisters, stand firm. Let nothing...
Verse of the Day
  Commentary on Today's Verse   Commentary on John 6:28-35   (Read John 6:28-35)   Constant exercise of faith in Christ, is the most important and difficult part of the obedience required from us, as sinners seeking salvation. When by his grace we are enabled to live a life of faith in the Son of God, holy tempers follow, and acceptable services may be...
Verse of the Day
  Commentary on Today's Verse   Commentary on 2 Corinthians 3:12-18   (Read 2 Corinthians 3:12-18)   It is the duty of the ministers of the gospel to use great plainness, or clearness, of speech. The Old Testament believers had only cloudy and passing glimpses of that glorious Saviour, and unbelievers looked no further than to the outward institution. But the great precepts of...
Verse of the Day
  Commentary on Today's Verse   Commentary on 2 Thessalonians 3:1-5   (Read 2 Thessalonians 3:1-5)   Those who are far apart still may meet together at the throne of grace; and those not able to do or receive any other kindness, may in this way do and receive real and very great kindness. Enemies to the preaching of the gospel, and persecutors of...
Related Classification
Copyright 2023-2026 - www.mreligion.com All Rights Reserved