Who Is the Virtuous Woman in Proverbs 31?

  Many women acquainted with Proverbs 31 struggle with a love-hate relationship with the virtuous woman depicted in this chapter. Her persona comes across with such a high standard that most of us feel unable to measure up to her level.

  However, if we approach this chapter with the eyes and ears of those to whom it was written and with the foundation of the passage being the Word of God, precious treasure unearths. Digging beneath the surface, the virtuous woman gives us insight into living our lives today. This woman encourages us to follow God and pursue personal growth.

  

Who Wrote this Proverb about a Virtuous Woman?

Distinguished by its teaching about a virtuous woman, Proverbs 31 cites King Lemuel as the author in the first verse.

  “The words of King Lemuel, the utterance which his mother taught him: What, my son? And what, son of my womb? And what, son of my vows?” (Proverbs 31:1-2 NKJV)

  King Lemuel honored his mother’s counsel in poetic form. Verses 1-9 detail advice for a king. This Queen Mother’s superb instructions apply not just to their unique mother-son relationship. All leaders can benefit from her wise advice.

  Who was King Lemuel of Proverbs 31? The Hebrew Bible titles the book of Proverbs as “The Proverbs of Solomon.” The simple sayings and illustrations teach basic spiritual and practical life principles. King Solomon likely authored most of the Proverbs.

  At this point, historical records haven’t discovered a king named Lemuel. Ancient Jewish tradition identifies Lemuel as King Solomon, as do many commentaries. Most scholars accept him as the probable author of Proverbs 31.

  The title, “The Proverbs of Solomon,” doesn’t exclude other authors. It is widely thought that a young Solomon compiled the chapter’s “sayings of the wise” before his many wives turned his heart away from God.

  Proverbs 25:1 acknowledges King Hezekiah’s men as compilers of some of Solomon’s proverbs.

  “These are more proverbs of Solomon, compiled by the men of Hezekiah king of Judah . . . ” (Proverbs 25:1 NIV)

  Some suggest that King Lemuel is another name for King Hezekiah. Hagar, attributed with Proverbs 30, and Lemuel with Proverbs 31, coupled with King Hezekiah’s role from chapter 25, show several authors under the umbrella of Solomon’s wisdom.

  Another possible explanation for Lemuel’s identity stems from the many examples in Scripture of different names for the same person. Lemuel could be a familiar reference derived from another name, a nickname, or a diminutive. King Lemuel’s name means “for God” or “devoted to God.” Similarly, in 2 Samuel 2:25, God named Solomon “Jedediah.” Jedediah means “beloved of the Lord.”

  Even though we haven’t been given certain specifics of authorship, the king’s teachings ring clear. These verses call for honor, morality, integrity, and the use of authority for the good of others.

  While we may not know exactly who reigned as King Lemuel, we do know who inspired the words. God inspired these rich verses of poetry and practical advice.

  

What Details Does Proverbs 31 Give Us about a Virtuous Woman?

Proverbs 31:10-31 describes a virtuous woman.

  Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.” (Proverbs 31:10 KJV)

  The sage advice of King Lemuel originates from his mother. The entire passage details the godly character displayed through the virtuous woman’s life and work.

  The author circles through her virtues in a literary form known as chiastic structure. Chiasm presents and then repeats the idea in reverse order as if mirroring its ideas. Throughout these verses, her worth, character, work, relationships, and responsibilities cycle through, repeating, demonstrating, and reinforcing a woman of virtue.

  These twenty-one verses describe a virtuous woman in acrostic poetry. Each verse, originally written in Hebrew script from right to left, begins with a letter of the alphabet in sequence.

  Merriam-Webster equates virtuous with moral excellence and righteousness. Various Bible translations use “excellent,” “noble character,” “worthy,” and “good” for this concept. In the original language, the Hebrew word chayil, or “virtuous,” designates strength, might, efficiency, or ability.

  In the love story of Ruth and Boaz, the same Hebrew word elevates Ruth. Translated in the ESV as a “worthy woman,” she also displayed diligence, care for others, and loyal love for God.

  “And now, my daughter, do not fear. I will do for you all that you ask, for all my fellow townsmen know that you are a worthy woman.” (Ruth 3:11 ESV)

  And again, chayil in Proverbs 12:4 describes an “excellent wife” (ESV) as being like a crown to her husband.

  Here are some words which describe her. How many of them would you like for others to see in you?

  - Noble

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  - Worthy

  - Values Relationships

  - Diligent

  - Hard Worker

  - Motivated

  - Capable

  - Compassionate

  - Prepared

  - Caring

  - Strong

  - Willing

  - Financially Responsible

  - Bold

  - Enterprising

  - Creative

  - Ambitious

  - Speaks with wisdom

  - Displays dignity

  - Fears God

  This exceptional woman of Proverbs 31 sounds like someone who would be welcomed in today’s culture. Although today we seldom use the word “virtuous,” Proverbs describes a woman we should get to know. But it is not until we read through to the end that we discover the true source of her strength.

  

Have We Misunderstood What a Virtuous Woman Is?

Sometimes women find themselves reluctant to accept the virtuous woman of Proverbs 31 because they misunderstand her or others have misinterpreted her. Segments of the church may have used these verses to support certain interpretations beyond the text’s teaching. Many women find her intimidating. Some look at her impressive resume through eyes of personal comparison and feelings of inadequacy.

  While her achievements seem immense and her accomplishments many, we must look deeper. We enter her world with our cultural spin if we neglect to understand her within her culture and timeline. By doing so, we miss powerful truths offered to women who want to follow God and make Him the core of all they do in their work and life.

  The beginning introduction to a “virtuous woman” concludes as customary in the chiastic cycle with the real DNA of her person. Now we see the fount of her virtue.

  “Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.” (Proverbs 31:30 ESV)

  The virtuous woman fears God.

  Her moral character, the strength of her capabilities, her decisions, and her wisdom come from a foundational belief in God. This relationship of respect and authority in her life toward her Lord guides all the rest of her life. It brings purpose and meaning into action.

  The virtuous woman in Proverbs is a composite of attributes that honor God and bring personal fulfillment to ordinary life. These qualities reflect her deep relationship with the God she serves. The better and deeper we understand her, the more we desire to be like her. This significant woman is one we want to emulate.

  

Steps Toward Being a Virtuous Woman Today

A virtuous woman does not find her value through the eyes of her culture or societal norms; rather, she knows her value comes from God. She desires to please Him above all others. In so doing, the pieces of her character and life arrange themselves under one larger purpose. She fears God and, by doing so, gains a heart of wisdom. She respects Him as the true Lord of her life, aligning relationships, work, and ambitions in obedience to His will. Her example provides standards and objectives for us as well.

  What steps can you take today toward becoming a virtuous woman?

  1. Be sure of your standing in Christ. As children of King Jesus, your worth and value are secure in Him rather than in the many other things this world prizes. This truth brings stability and steadfastness into relationships with others.

  2. Nurture your walk with Jesus. Find strength in Him by growing in knowledge of Him. Know God better by reading His Word and praying to Him. As you feed your soul on His truth and wisdom, you become more like Him. By spending time in His presence, you will learn to discern what brings Him joy and sorrow. You will learn to distinguish right from wrong and grow in capacity to choose best.

  3. Honor Him and His instructions with obedience. Place Him highest.

  4. Surround yourself with others who hold your values, spiritual desires, and be accountable to them. Get involved in a Bible-teaching church. Make time for blessing others who need strengthening. Walk with moral integrity.

  5. Be diligent in your work environment. Raise your own bar. You may have heard the saying, “If it’s worth doing, it’s worth doing well.” Work with excellence.

  6. Challenge your personal growth. Learn new things. Hone the skills God has given you.

  If you struggle in a love-hate relationship with the virtuous woman of Proverbs 31, wondering how to measure up, read it again through the eyes of an admiring learner. She feared God. She worked hard and well. Her relationship with God brought opportunities to influence others for good. She showed guts and tenacity. The virtuous woman provides a timeless and treasured example for women everywhere.

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